


Descend into Freedom

by exavier



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Don't expect anything here to be healthy, Falling In Love, High School AU?, Jim Moriarty is 17, Jim Moriarty is a Little Shit, M/M, Manipulation, Obsession, Sebastian is 28, Sebastian is Jim's Philosophy teacher, Teacher-student relationship but nothing happens until Jim is legal, Underage - Freeform, it's complicated - Freeform, murders, murders eventually
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-04
Updated: 2018-09-04
Packaged: 2019-07-06 23:53:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15896694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/exavier/pseuds/exavier
Summary: Sebastian Moran is trying to adjust back to civilian life after the war. He hates to admit that he misses the adrenaline, he misses shooting real targets. One of his students -- the 17 year old Jim Moriarty -- knows that and he seems determined to lead Moran on the path of destruction.





	Descend into Freedom

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: It's not a healthy relationship. It's not meant to be a healthy relationship. We do not approve of their unhealthy relationship, or their future murders. This is meant to be a story, fiction, exploring two characters that frankly no one in the fandom should expect to be healthy at this point. 
> 
> Enjoy!

Mr. Moran, you're hard. In the classroom. JM 

 

And who's fault is that? SM

 

I've got no idea. Just wanted to say that nobody else noticed your problem, sir. JM

 

Sorry. I was out of line. I meant to say thank you. I'll take care of it. SM

 

Now I'm curious. Who are you thinking about? Nina? She's very pretty. JM

 

What? I'm not discussing that with you! Go back to writing your assignment! SM

 

So I'm right? JM

 

No, you're mistaken. SM

 

Mark then? He's the hottest one here. JM

 

Will you stop with that? This is embarrassing and inappropriate as it is. SM

 

Come on, I'm curious. JM

I'd be jealous if you liked him. JM

 

I'm your teacher! Isn't thinking such things similar to picturing your parents having sex? SM

 

Not really. You're younger than my parents. JM

 

Oh, right. SM

Wait. What do you mean you'd be jealous? SM

 

Mark is taking me out tonight. It would be a problem if you liked him. JM

 

l don't like him. SM

He's taking you out? SM

 

Yeah. JM

 

I didn't know you and him were... Okay, that's good. Just don't forget to study. I don't want you ruining your grades. SM

 

Hey, we're going out often. But never have done it as a date. JM

 

Oh. Okay. I've no idea why you're telling me this. I don't really care. SM

 

I don't know why I’m telling you either. JM

 

Are you sure he's the right one for you though? SM

 

Don’t know that either. JM

So you were thinking about your girlfriend then? JM

  
  


This is private. I'm not discussing it with a student. SM

 

Oh, so you have a girlfriend now? JM

 

No, I don't. SM

Not that it's any of your business. SM

 

Boyfriend then? I see you quite often at the gay club. JM

 

Please, can you concentrate on your assignment now? SM

 

I've done everything, sir. JM

 

What were you doing at the gay club??? SM

 

Fuck… l didn't tell you about it, okay? JM  

 

It's ﬁne. I won't tell anyone. SM

 

Promise? JM

 

Cross my heart in hope to die. SM

 

Mmhm. Good. I see you there every weekend. JM

 

I go there every now and then... I am bi so sometimes I just need... Hey, I don't have to explain myself to you! SM

 

I’ve always been curious about one thing. JM

 

Not surprised. You've always been curious. What is it this time? SM

 

Why are you going away from the club together with a new guy every week? You could ﬁnd someone good enough once and don't bother. JM

 

[delayed] They're not what I'm looking for. Besides I suck at relationships. SM

 

I'm sorry, sir, but you're lying. It's something else. You're too tired and lazy to ﬁnd a new partner every week yet you have to. But why? JM

 

Because I want to sleep with them. Don't overthink it. SM

 

You know, I'm fucking curious now, Seb. JM  

 

Seb??? What happened to Mr. Moran? SM

 

I'm sorry, sir. Just too happy that I understood. JM

You're not making your lovers go. They're leaving you. JM

Mr. Moran, what does that suggest if even call boys leave you in a week? JM

 

[slight delay] l told you l suck at relationships. SM

 

l was right. Come on, tell me that I'm right. JM

 

You're right. They leave me. Happy now? SM

 

Is it so hard for you to say that I'm a good clever boy? You're mean. JM

 

I’m not saying any of this and this conversation has to end now. SM

 

Mr. Moran, it's only your business, okay? I'm not going to ask you about your kinks. It doesn’t bother me. JM

 

What do you know about my kinks? SM

 

Nothing. But I know that you've got a few. It's the only reason why call boys leave their good clients. Only if clients suggest something too unusual. JM

 

You seem to be too familiar with these matters. SM

 

Shouldn't bother you. JM

 

I am your teacher. Of course it bothers me. SM 

 

My sex life isn't any of your business. JM

 

Do you even have a sex life? In that club? With all those older guys? Doesn't sound very healthy. SM

 

You're one of those older guys. JM

 

I can go to a club, Jim. I'm 28. SM

 

So old. JM

 

Fuck off! SM

Sorry. I don't like to be teased about my age. SM

 

It was sarcasm, about your age, Mr. Moran. I shouldn't say it, but you still handsome and looking very good. JM

 

Thank you. SM

 

And no. I'm not a whore. If that’s what you were hinting at. I just go out to have fun and free drinks. JM

 

Good to know you're not a prostitute. Still you shouldn't be drinking. But then again I was 17 myself. I haven't quite forgotten what it was like. SM

 

Good to know. JM

Oh, and one more thing. Be more careful with some boys. They like to talk too much. JM

 

What's that supposed to mean? What have you heard? SM

 

I've heard nothing, sir. But I needed to warn you. JM

 

Well, I thank you for your concern, Jim. Now we should probably end this discussion. SM

 

Okay, ﬁne. I'm tired of hearing about "very handsome man who pays a lot, but I'm not going to stay with him even if he pays me a million". JM

 

That's what they say about me? I shouldn't be surprised... SM

 

Well, yes. They also say that you're an amazing lover. That part’s impressive. JM

 

Right. You shouldn't be listening to such things about your teacher. SM

 

I hear and say a lot of naughty things, sir. JM

 

That’s becoming increasingly clearer. SM

 

Does it bother you? JM

 

You look at me with those big brown innocent eyes but the quirk of your lips says it all. You're not fooling me! SM

And to answer your question, yes. lt bothers me as a teacher. SM

 

I didn't notice I was doing anything. I’m sorry. I thought I was only blushing and nothing more. JM 

 

[delayed] No need to apologize. I'm the one who's sorry. I don't know what's with me today. SM

 

You need to relax. Go out somewhere. JM

 

What for? It all ends the same way. SM

 

Or this small fucking town is killing you too? I know it’s killing me. JM

 

Sometimes I wish |could just leave... SM

Do you feel like it's suffocating you too? SM

 

I want to get out of here. As soon as possible. JM

 

Don't miss your chance like I did. SM

 

I’ll leave when I have enough money. JM

You can still run away. JM

 

Anywhere feels the same to me now. It doesn’t matter anymore. But you go. You’re a clever boy. I wish you good luck! SM

 

[delayed] I'm sorry but you're an idiot. JM

You say everywhere feels the same to you but that’s just the PTSD talking. JM 

 

Watch it! SM

 

Ooh, what are you going to do? Punish me? JM

 

You're crossing a line here, boy. I might just do that! Careful what you say! SM

 

I'm just saying that you're free to do whatever the hell you want. You should be reminded of that. JM 

 

You don't know what's it like in my head! I can't escape that! No matter where I go! SM

 

I don't know what's inside of your head, sir. That’s true. But have you even tried to escape? Tried to shoot again? JM

 

It's not the same shooting at paper targets… SM

 

Have you tried to show them all how angry you are? How you hate all this shit? JM

 

It's horrible to say that! I’m fucked up. I need to suppress that. Why did you ask at all!? Why are you making me think about it again!? SM

 

Am I wrong? JM

 

[delayed] No. SM

I shouldn't think too much. It never ends well when l show my anger. SM

 

Have you tried to find a proper outlet for it, Sebastian? JM

 

[delayed] Why do you think they're all running from me? SM

 

I didn't ask, so I don't know. And it's not my business. As you said several times. JM

 

Very true. It's not. I said too much already! I never talk about this to anyone! Why am I talking to you? SM

 

Because I understand you. Unlike others. I can see you. The real you. The person you’ve become behind the mask you show everyone else. I know you, Sebastian. JM

Come on, do something you want. Only one thing. Promise me that you'll do it. One thing that you truly want. Give yourself that at least. JM

 

I can promise to try. SM

 

Good. I’ll take that as a positive. JM

 

Thanks. And thanks for listening without making me feel like shit. SM

When are you going to the club again? I don't want you to be alone there. SM

 

I'm safe there. Safer than at home or at school anyway. Don't worry. JM

 

You’re not safe? Is someone hurting you? SM

 

Told you not to worry about it. I’m handling myself pretty well. JM 

 

I need to know you’re safe. SM

 

I don't think that I'll be going to the club at this week. JM

 

Why the sudden change of heart? SM

 

Does it matter? JM

 

Of course! You can tell me. I already told you so much. SM

 

Why do you ask? Are you disappointed? Did you want to see me there? At the club? JM

 

Jim… SM

 

I'm not feeling so well. That's all. JM

 

Is something wrong? Did something happen? SM 

 

It's just a cold. JM 

 

Are you sure? If you’re in trouble you should tell someone! You can tell me. SM

 

Moran watched as Jim Moriarty began typing his reply but then suddenly the bell rang and the boy only put away his phone with a shrug and a small casual smile towards his teacher. The rest of the class suddenly started buzzing too, leaving their papers on top of his desk and exiting the room, but Moran only had eyes for one particular student. As he usually did. 

 

He had never went as far as today though. Talking to Jim about all those things, those  _ grownup  _ things, was wrong. Hell, he shouldn’t even be allowing Jim to use his phone during class! Instead he actually participated… 

“I hope you like my paper, Mr. Moran,” the familiar voice said. Moran looked up at the boy, feeling utterly wrecked on the inside. Jim’s lips were quirked up in a small smirk. He was there and gone in the blink of an eye. But Moran knew well that he’d visit him again, and this time somewhere Moran could not escape from him. In Moran’s own twisted mind. 

 

***

 

He did not see Jim Moriarty at the club that night. Nor did he saw him there the night after that. Or the night after that. Come to think of it, Moran was perhaps frequenting that bar way too often. He should cut down on that. It didn’t give him the kind of high he craved anyway. 

 

Jim never missed a class though. That was when Moran could talk to him, discuss Philosophy with him. That was the appropriate format for their conversations. Nothing like what they did the last time when their texts went out of hand. The confessions had escaped under Moran’s typing fingers one by one. He re-read their thread and was surprised to see that he couldn’t even tell why he had said all that. Private things that he had a hard time sharing even with his own freaking shrink. Yet, Jim fucking Moriarty, a schoolboy of 17, got out of him in no time. He didn’t want to think about why. There was just something special about Moriarty. Something other boys his age did not have. Was it his mind? The way he behaved? He was definitely a very intelligent and clever young man. There was no doubt about that. Did that alone made Moran act so mindlessly? So utterly out of control? 

 

Well, he still had control. He was still on top of the situation. They’ve talked like equals for a while but Moran knew they were not. Moran knew he was a teacher now. Moran knew what he was doing. Yes, he still had control. 

 

***

 

“You know what’s the thing that always makes people miserable? It’s control. Ha! Control!” Moriarty laughed from Sebastian’s laptop screen. He took a sip from his non-alcoholic beverage and then looked back at the camera. “People want to control things. And they can’t. Not really. Not if you’re a moron, which you probably are. Don’t get me wrong. Practically everyone’s a moron. It’s not just you. So, that’s good. For you. But for me it's just boring!” 

 

Moran paused the video and ran his fingers through his messy hair. Tomorrow was his day off so he could enjoy a bit of drinking, a bit of depravity. So he settled on staying home alone, drinking beer, and watching Jim Moriarty’s YouTube channel. It hadn’t even appeared to Moran to google Jim or check if he had a YouTube channel until the young man mentioned it in class that day. Then it was the  _ only _ thing Moran could think about. Which lead us to the paused video. 

 

He unpaused and continued listening to Jim’s own philosophies, opinions, little frustrations and pleasures. And he found himself… fascinated. He was fascinated with that boy, with his thoughts and the way he expressed them. He craved for more. It was relaxing and calming somehow, in a very weird way because Moriarty’s videos were anything but calming or relaxing. They were often filled with anger. Sometimes he would just explode on camera, letting out his rage and passions, showing his emotions. Then he would suddenly just calm down, smile that little smile of his and become picture of serenity. It was fascinating. Was it an act? Or was that really just what Moriarty was like? 

 

From what Sebastian had read from his student, it seemed that this was exactly what Moriarty was like. But no one could be that… intriguing… exciting… charismatic… Capturing Sebastian’s attention over and over again until the thought of Jim Moriarty consumed him. 

 

“Let’s say, for example, that you’re an ex-soldier. You like shooting. It’s what made you feel safe on the battlefield. It’s normal.” 

 

Moran’s heart skipped a beat and he could feel himself pale at the words in the video. He leaned forward, closer to the screen, and continued watching. 

 

“You’re a civilian now. You don’t need your gun. But you don’t feel safe without it, you either feel attacked, or you miss the buzz of excitement, the adrenaline. In other words, they say your mind is fucked up,” here Moriarty smirked again, his eyes looking directly at the camera, directly at Sebastian. “You’re not screwed. Your mind is not fucked up. They simply don’t understand. They don’t get you. Because they’re not you. And because they’re monkeys, they’re stupid. But that doesn’t mean you should let stupid rules control you. Control, as I said, is the enemy. It’s a false sense of security when you think you have control over yourself. You don’t. It’s a false sense of superiority when you think you have control over others. You don’t. The sooner you accept that, the sooner you let yourself loose, set yourself free, the better you’d feel. Your… torment, your sorrow… all of that desperation and suppressed anger… it will disappear. Just let go,” Moran was in a trance, as if the boy’s voice had cast a spell on him. “LET GO!” Moriarty suddenly shouted angrily at the camera and Sebastian jumped in his seat, knocking over his beer. 

 

“Shit…” he mumbled and had to pause to clean up. 

 

What was Jim Moriarty doing to him? 


End file.
